A dear mom letter

Dear Mom,

I know you will never read this, but I lost my job today because of you. You know how I always loved you. Well, I told some of my co-workers I needed money to help pay for your funeral. I know this was a bad idea to do at work, but at the time it seemed the right thing to do. They did, indeed, loan me some money. It seems this would be a good thing. Unfortunately, I had to give the money right back, was fired, and the police are investigating me for fraud. I guess you picked a really bad moment to visit me at work.


Signed,
A complete idiot who thought lying about his mom dying was a good idea.
I mean, what was this guy thinking? How would he explain any encounter he or anyone else had with her? What would he do when she REALLY died? Well done, Florin Radu Hretu. You are an object lesson to us all.