At least, that is what I would say:

I wasn't there to hear them, but I imagine the conversation went something like this.

Deputy Shadrick: "What are you doing?"

Jennifer Hunt: "Who? You mean me?"

Shadrick: "Yes, you and I seem to be the only people around here. What were you doing behind the church?"

Hunt: "Oh, I was, uh...I was...I was..."

Shadrick: "I would say you were lurking."

Hunt: "Oh, no sir, I never lurk. I was relieving myself."

Shadrick: "Uh, yeah. And now you seem really happy to see me. Madam, I am going to need to see some identification."

Hunt: "Okay, I have some in my car, conveniently parked over here out of the light."

<clang>

Shadrick: "What just fell out of your pants? Is that...is that a crowbar? You don't look quite as happy to see me now..."

I think this one actually IS something to write home about. It is not every day a woman drops her crowbar to show you her pants.