Ah...the wonders of July

It is no secret I am not a big fan of the heat. I actually have it written in every contract that any time it is over 70 degrees if there is no breeze I am not just allowed but actually REQUIRED to complain.

I vastly prefer month after month of rain to two consecutive days of brutally hot weather...say anything over 75, with or without breeze.

Which makes it all that much funnier to be spending this week in Branson, Misery and Red Cloud, Nebraska....two of the hottest places in the identifiable realm of human habitation.

I will say it is worth it this time. Been a really great week with the parents-in-law, the Aunt and Uncle, and of course my wonderful wife.

It was a great week of hanging out, seeing the sights, hanging out at the pool...

Pool. Ah, yes, the best part of the story.

See, I hate "slime". And is there any substance known to man slimier than sun block? Maybe baby snot...but nothing else.

I despise the greasy, slimy, unguent feel of sun block.

My wife, being a wise, loving woman who knows she at times must protect me from myself, insisted on slathering it on me each trip to the pool. I know why she does it and appreciate both the thought behind it and the effort expended to apply it despite my incessant whining about not liking it.

She faithfully did so every day except the last. That day I escaped her loving clutches and went sun block-less.

And, as per her dire warnings, there was indeed a very painful sunburn acquired.

As a general rule when I err I admit to it, often quite publicly.

This will NOT be one of those times. You see, the heinous, painful sunburn was not acquired by the pseudo-albino I am. No, no, no.

The wonderful young lady who dutifully slathers on buckets of sun-block got it.

This seems like a great time for me to say..."hahhahahahahaa I told you so."

But I will not because I want to live.


Riot Kitty said...

Oh no!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you chose to live! My skin is now peeling. Too bad you aren't here to help me pick dead/dying skin off of me and witiness the juicy goodness when my blisters pop. Ha ha!!! -EB

Scribe said...

Good choice, Darth. The "I told you so" stance should only be done when you're standing 5000 miles away. Trust me.

Oh, and have you tried the spray sunblock? It's not as slimey and easier to apply. You might suggest it to the wife, or if you value your life...

Darth Weasel said...

Goose, you know I will pick anything off you whenever you need it...cuz Weiurd Al says, "If that isn't love, I don't know what love is"

Scribe, funny you should mention that...I actually am (now) several thousand miles away...so in theory it would be safe. But she has friends...sneaky, malicious, dangerous friends...who know where I live...