Just before the interview this morning, I sent a sort of broadcast text to a few people I regularly text with (I pretty much only harass people I KNOW have unlimited text because otherwise it is just too expensive. Which, by the way, I have unlimited text and data, so if you have my number, never fear to send whatever. I will read and respond)
Anyway, I texted this:
1 hour til interview. Weird mix of confidence I will crush it but pessimism still will not get it.
In many ways, that text is a summation of my life. I have a lot of confidence in my skills and abilities, but little confidence I will see results.
As for the interview, it went pretty much like I expected. I (almost) completely crushed it. I have a second interview.
But I will be canceling that interview for a variety of reasons, one of which takes you deep into the dark corners of my mind.
See, when I got the initial voice mail responding to my e-mailed resume, part of the info was that they are a Fortune 500 company.
Good for them. Good to know. Moving on.
And after I got her voicemail when I called back, when we finally talked live, it was mentioned they are a Fortune 500 company...and then told what modes of dress they expected, largely because they are a Fortune 500 company and that is the sort of image I would need.
When I got there for the interview, the receptionist mentioned that they are a Fortune 500 company.
So did the guy wearing the ratty sports sweatshirt because it is casual Friday, though he does their orientation usually but was on his way out the door (after dropping papers about 5 times...hilarious).
Oh, and the office guy walking up to talk to the receptionist also mentioned in passing that they are a Fortune 500 company.
And about 3 times in the interview, it was mentioned that they are a Fortune 500 Company, and it was mentioned my second interview would have been today instead of Tuesday if i had worn a tie, because a tie is part of a suit and they are a Fortune 500 company and have an image to project.
More power to them.
It is a product I can get on board with that fills a very necessary niche, and the people being helped by it need it. I would be great at it, no question. This is the type of job where I would be that guy who left a big hole in the place when I retired in thirty years where everyone said, "How will we replace him?"
But I have the wrong mind set to work there.
I do not get off on status. I do not care if a company is Fortune 500 or a tiny little mom and pop operation. I just care that I have the proper tools to do my job, that the effort I put into the job is appreciated, compensated, and reciprocated.
I do not need the status of working for a famous company. I do not need the status of working for an elite company.
I need a place that prepares, supports, and appreciates me.
Nobody works harder to do a good job than I do, and that has nothing to do with the popularity or fame of a company. It has to do with me.
On the bright side, I was one of a select few to get an interview, and part of an even more select group asked back for part two.
On the dark side...although I think the company is a good one, it is not right for me. Too bad. Just think how good a situation it would have been if they were a Fortune 501 company instead.
What I wanted to say - Dear Tootie, You are no longer suffering, and for that I am grateful. I've gone through so many feelings since you left this world Saturday. Grief, relief...
1 week ago