Are You Normal?

We all know the "Average American" is a non-entity, a social construct of assumptions that make up someone who does not exist. There is no such thing as an average American. However...there MAY be a "normal" American. So I have created an easy test to help you disvocer if you are normal:

1) You go into the bank. Do you
A) make a deposit or withdrawal using approved, bank-sectioned methods?
B) run around looking for free toasters?
C) rob it?

2) You go to the convenience store. Do you
A) purchase overpriced items of questionable quality?
B) attempt to purchase a Big Mac and fries?
C) fill out an application including your name and phone number and rob it?

3) Your neighbor goes on vacation. Do you
A) care for their pets, bring in their mail and watch their house?
B) start parking in their driveway?
C) Deconstruct their house and sell everything from bricks to furniture to the sink?

Now, the suspicious person might say the C choices are ridiculous...despite the fact that in all three cases, it is the correct answer. Don't believe me? Check this out:

A police spokesman said: "A local resident decided to take it away piece by piece, and he dismantled it for construction materials.
"This is not though the first such case we have come across, and in remote areas it is considered normal by some people."


So you heard it here first; if your neighbor goes on vacation and you refuse to dismantle their house and sell it...you are not normal.

2 comments:

Riot Kitty said...

So I'm not the only one running around looking for free toasters? ;)

JLee said...

you forgot to add "all of the above" to the choices. ;)