Top 5 jobs you might want

If you need to make a living but prefer your own schedule you might think about any of these fine occupations.

5) On-ramp beggar
Oh, to be sure the big money is from 6:30 - 9 in the morning and 4 - 7 at night but you can make a living at all hours of the day just by standing there with some stupid cardboard sign.

4) Tin can recycler
You can go for walks whenever you wish and collect cans and bottles by the roadside, turn them in and live off the money.

3) Downtown air-wrecker
Simply take the guitar you never learned to play downtown and sit there with the case open playing mangled tunes, singing horrible lyrics in an off-key voice and watch the money roll in. You can do it almost any hour of the day or night.

2) Politician
With subtle presure in the right place you can have all the money, sex and drugs you want...some of it even legal!

1) sell your skin. You can have various businesses tattood on you and walk around with your shirt off...for the right price, of course....

as an addendum, how, exactly, can you be unemployed if you have a job, even a stupid one like this?