File this under "Things I did not want to hear"

Our dogs name is Bella. She is a tiny little chihuahua. And not all that smart...

Anyhow, the wife and I went grocery shopping. On the way home she called her mom and was talking. I, of course, heard but one side of the conversation, but that side went like this.

"So how is Bella?"

"Uh-huh. And did she poop?"

"Did she eat it?"

"That little turd! How come she only eats it when I want it?"

For the record...she MEANT when she wanted to clean it up. But she said...well, I do not know, because about that moment A) my eardrums exploded, B) I vomited, 3) we careened out of control and hurtled off the road, crashed in a big fireball and possibly died.