Since the bully fight was so much fun...

Growing up in St. Helens, snow was a rarity. Every four or five years we would get enough to go sledding down the 11th street hill. It was pretty cool. Cops would close off the top and bottom with barricades so the kids could use it for that purpose. 

Of course, a lot of us could not afford sleds we used other stuff. Les Schwab would give away inner tubes, sometimes we would use garbage can lids (and the more fortunate of us doing that would wrap them in garbage bags to make it slide better. I was not, for the record, one of the fortunate ones) and sometimes it was just a piece of cardboard. 

Well, when sledding or doing whatever, we would dress warmly. As in, t-shirt, sweatshirt, another sweatshirt, another sweatshirt if we could, a coat, another coat, and so forth.

Once I was wearing at least 2 sweatshirts, a regular coat, an army coat, and over that a sheepskin coat. I probably had on thirty pounds of coats. I could barely move my arms.

Well, for whatever reason, my close friend Alan and I, once during the snow, got into a disagreement. To this day I cannot say what it was about. 

What I do remember is we came to blows. 

Well...rather...we TRIED to come to blows. Since we were both bundled up so well it was more like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man throwing pseudo-hay makers at the Michelin Man. A roundhouse probably traveled 3".

I cannot think of anything less likely to hurt someone; one heavily clothed goofball throwing 3" punches at someone wearing more than 3" of coats. 

Basically it became a grapple, we fell to the ground, tried to get up. Finally got up. Looked at each other. 

He said, "I guess it is time for me to go home."

I nodded.

A couple hours later we talked for a bit on the phone, got together and moved on with our lives. The fight probably lasted 15 seconds or so. One of the weirdest, lamest, most pointless things I have ever been a part of. 

And now, thanks to my habit of writing irrelevant snippets and your habit of reading them, you too have been part of it. 

Hopefully the mental images got a cheap laugh because, believe it or else, that was really the entire point of this.