The perfect gift

Our first anniversary is less than a week away and I have been wracking my brain searching for the perfect gift. How do you properly thank someone for a great year? Time is irreplaceable...if you err in your choice of mate that time is gone. Of course, during the year I have worked hard to give her a good year as well but with such a monumental symbolical celebratory day fast approaching I want to come up with something special.

I considered a few options for trips to various places...but her hectic 4 days a week scholastic schedule somewhat annuls that idea. She is not a big jewelry fiend which is fine by me because it is hard to personalize jewelry. Even if you put on her name and a special inscription, at the end of the day what is it? A bracelet. How many people have bracelets? Hint:rhetorical question. It doesn't matter how many people have them because so few DON'T that it is hardly a personal gift.

Dinner and a movie is so common for us that it hardly makes the grade for such an auspicious occasion. All things Hello Kitty have already been supplied by Riot Kitty. I am running out of ideas here.

But at last I came up with it: the PERFECT gift for a first anniversary. I mean, it is rare, hard to obtain, and certainly somewhat personal. I will get her...wait for it...


mosquito corpses.

Thank you, Nin Nan, for this awesome idea.

Now, some might question the romantic nature of this gift. I, in fact, might be one of those people. But an idea this stupendous is really hard to write a joke for. Not so much for the fact that this idiot advertises them for sale as for the fact there are 10,000 people out there stupid enough to purchase a mosquito corpse. Really, what can I write that is funnier than that?

(And yes, for those keeping track...this really was about the joke, not what to get the Goose)