Mirror, mirror, on the wall...

Remember in Snow White when those words are uttered? "Mirror, mirror, on the wall...whose the fairest of them all?" And the reply is something along the lines of "Mighty queen, though you are fair...someone else looks better".? Okay, so I have no clue how the mirror phrased it. Something poetic and deep no doubt. The point is...the mirror lied.

The wicked queen was anything but beautiful. She was all angles and sneers. For that scene to be believable they could have given us something like Jessica Rabbit from Who Framed Roger Rabbit or Holly from ....uh....don't actually remember the name of that movie, but Holly turns into a live Kim Basinger. I only know that because a friend who, for reasons about to become obvious shall remain nameless to protect the idiotic, loved the movie because he could freeze-frame her free fall and get a pantie peek. I will leave it to your imagination how sad and desperate he must be to have freeze-frame his way into seeing that...much less, and yes, he showed it to me...and it was not a good picture. The average teen-age male probably has a better picture on his wall with much better resolution but...whatever. To each their own.

Anyway, Jessica Rabbit, Holly, or smurf...even Jasmine from Aladdin, Belle from Beauty and The Beast, the girl from The Little Mermaid....any of them crushes the second most beautiful woman in the world, the evil queen. So how does that work? Was the mirror struck blind? Or were we just supposed to miss that plot point?

So I am starting a petition to make sure all future villainesses in cartoons meet a minimum hotness requirement.

Please sign below:
1) Some loser who cares how "hot" cartoon villainesses are.