Ways to impress your wife, Part 1

A few weeks ago I wrote about the genius who wanted to make up with his girlfriend and thought it was a good idea to ram her car. Shortly after that I wrote about the dude who tried to impress his date by leaping from a bridge. I thought I had the topper when I wrote about the dude who gave his wife to pay some bills. Oh, how wrong I was....

Let's go to the internal monologue.

Sure glad I could play poker tonight. Of course, it hasn't been a particularly good night...I am almost out of money. Well, let's see how this hand goes.

D'oh! Now I am totally out of money but not out of time....must....stay...in...game...but how?
Aha! I shall bet my wife!

Good thinking, dude. What wife would not be ecstatic to think her husband A) is that bad at playing cards and B) having lost that much, once he got through the "valuable stuff", the money, is going to use her for stakes?

Why would she then divorce him? I mean, sure, he lost the hand...and sure, you were embarrassed, humiliated, and must have felt particularly undervalued and unappreciated....and he did lose you...but divorcing over a little thing like that? People are so picky these days...