If I ever become a thief, the first thing I steal

would probably be...oh, I don't know what it WOULD be...but I am pretty sure I know what it WOULDN'T be...it would not be what this guy in England made off with.

What on earth would make a guy it was a good idea? Let's check out his internal monologue.

"Dude, the Royal Oak Pub is a really cool place. I like it. I need a souvenir. But what type of souvenir would be the best? Matchbooks are passe...I have plenty of mugs at home....I can't wear sweatshirts at work....hmm. Wait a second...a pub. And what is the best part of any pub? Why the bathroom, of course. I love the smell of stale urine, thus my habit of never flushing a toilet....a toilet? Why...I could take one off the wall, stuff it in my rucksack (because, let's face it...who doesn't carry their rucksack around with them? Possibly the 99% of people who have no idea what a "rucksack" is...but everyone ELSE certainly carries them around)....yes, that is what I will do. I am going to steal a toilet! "

I guess the only thing worse than stealing a toilet for a souvenir would be getting caught on tape doing it...well done, 42 year old idiot.

1 comment:

Riot Kitty said...

That is hilarious! I bet it didn't fit in his ruck sack.