Hair it is...the hairiest post of the week

Considering the fact Dad has the Red Sea haircut...you know the one, hair to the left, hair to the right, and a part down the middle...(for those of you not religiously inclined, this stupid joke is brought to you by the Exodus account of the Israelites crossing the Red Sea in which they are described as passing between water to the left, water to the right, and the parting of the seas leaving a strip of land down the center. Still not funny, but at least you "get" it) it seems unwise for me to joke about hair loss. After all, it is a serious issue that affects many of us.
And not just men. My fiance has struggles with it, one coworkers wife is dealing with it...it happens to many people and is crossing gender lines with more frequency. There is not yet a known FPB or Female Pattern Baldness, but someday there might be.
So people losing their hair try lots of things to cover it up. There is Rogaine, Hair Club for Men, wigs, toupees, head shavings, and more. But there is still one thing that is seldom discussed. Perhaps it is just too embarrassing.
What do people do about other hair loss. You know what I am talking about...those embarrassing areas where noone wants to be hairless. Is there Rogaine for underarms?
Oh, you laugh, but underarm hair loss is a serious problem that afflicts many people I am sure. Who wants to be the one guy in the locker room who raises his arms only to reveal nude armpits?
Or even worse...the guys are hanging out plucking nose and ear hairs. What does the guy who suffered early ear hair loss do? It is hard to pluck nose hairs if you already tragically lost them.
Yes, hair loss is a serious issue, and it is about time society started helping out those who have lost it in some of the less talked about areas.
I am thinking maybe we could start an ad campaign. Of course, any major campaign needs a star, a celebrity to endorse it. Hair loss has a head start. There is a song ready made for the hair restoration and hair loss cover-up movement. It is by Eric Clapton.
If You listen to much Clapton then surely you have heard his epic "Cocaine". Now, a slight retouching of the words gives us this:
"If you got bad news,
want to sing the blues,
Rogaine
If hair's falling out,
got a bare scalp,
Rogaine
Don't go bald, don't go bald, don't go bald....
Rogaine"