Spork-free posting

It's time for the Smurfalympics, which are very similar to the Laff-a-lympics while still being completely different, only less funny.

First event is the Triple long smurf in which the sentence constructed with the longest word replaced by smurf wins. Last year, the winning replacement was "smurf", easily the longest word ever smurfed.
The second event will be the discuss smurf in which the object is to throw a smurf the greatest distance.
Next up will be the 400 smurf relay in which the object is to construct a sentence or paragraph containing 400 consecutive words properly replaced with the word smurf. To give you a preview, here is ace reporter Smurf Smurfly: "It is a smurfy day here at Smurf Stadium. Gargamel and Azrael are getting ready to reprise their roles as commentators as everyone anticipates the most smurfadelic smurf smurfing smurf smurfs smurf. And as everyone knows, that is always smurfy.
A crowd pleasing event concludes the festivities, the ever-popular High Smurf.
So come one, come all, watch the gold medals be won, the silvers be won, and everyone had a smurfing good time.