Another reason I spend half my life irritated

Finished cleaning the inside of my car, went inside, started watching a couple minutes of the little world series, the phone rings. I do not recognize the number, (201)210-3618. Some guy with a dreadfully thick accent asks for Andrew Barton. Then he tries to confirm my address as someplace in California.
I frankly tell him I have never lived in California. He says something along the lines of well, I need to confirm I am talking to Andrew Barton, is your birthday **-**-****. I reply "none of your business. I have never lived in California, I have no idea how you got this number, which is a private cell phone."
Now, at this point the conversation is clearly over. I have never lived in California, I do not currently live there, leave me alone. Does he?
"I need to talk to Andrew Barton about a very important business matter," he says, "so it is very important I confirm I am talking to Andrew Barton."
"Who do you work for?" I demanded. It took three or four tries to understand Global something or other. Then he was right back at it. "I need to know if your birthday is **-**-**** and your name is Andrew Barton."
"Again, you have reached a private cell phone number, I have never lived in California, and you have no business having this number. How did you get my number?"
"You gave it to me," he said. Now, let me assure you...that is an out and out lie. First off, I need a reason to get a hold of people. I have a handful of friends and family who are allowed this number. If you have the number, as a general rule it is because I trust you and assume you do not pass it out like candy. Furthermore, all of you who know me know I quit going by Andrew about the time I filed for divorce from Andrea, who did, by the way, have this number.
I was pretty miffed by this point. So when he said, "If you are going to be hostile then I don't want to talk to you."
So I held the phone as close to my mouth as possible and shouted rather loudly, "Then leave me alone!" and hung up.
Then I went to Google and entered the number.
Turns out they are some company called GlobalVantege out of California, a subsidiary of RCS Center Corporation, a debt collector.
Here is the problem with that. Well, besides the obvious that I have never lived in California (Andrea, however, did for a time on one of her adulteress adventures. That was the time she went with the crack guy, got the smurf beat out of her, was so afraid of him she left Taylor, our Dalmation, there, and decided what a wonderful person I was after all).
I have no debt other than the Mustang. I have even paid a couple of her bills because our court system is a joke. Believe me, if I ever see Michael on the street, he had best hope there is good steering on my car. A tragedy where the car went out of control.
However, there are no LEGITIMATE debts out there with my name on them. I have no credit cards, and that is a deliberate, conscious choice. I pay everything as I go.
So here is my plan. I have no doubt they will continue to call. And I have even less doubt I will become very, very, very abusive of them. I plan to purchase a whistle. Every time they call, I will blow it in their ear as loudly as possible. Then I will call this number: 866-877-0008, which is the number they want you to call back, and blow a whistle in their ear. I will do this repeatedly. I am going to make their life miserable. I have taken every bit of harrasment I am going to from people.
No more. Not one call. My patience is at an end. The whore has been out of my life for three years, I am not paying any of her debts. I am not paying any fraudulently made debts, either. And as sure as I am breathing, some piece of crap third party fake debt collecting thieves like the idiots at RCS are never going to see a penny.
I live pretty conservatively so I do not have to worry about debts or being unable to meet my obligations. That is why I successfully meet every legitamate obligation without worry.
So if you get bored and want to take a shot at a den of thieves and illegitimate operators, drop by a nearby phonebooth and call 866-877-0008 and tell them a story, blow a horn, just stay silent...whatever you can do to make their life miserable. Don't do it for me, do it because at some point the innocent need to stand up and make the lives of the guilty miserable.