The bumper sticker said...

As I was driving home from work I got stuck behind the behemoth, the bully of broadway, the compensation for a small hat size, the sign of mindless consumer consumption, the pointless bit of status symbol shouting, a humongous, giant red Ford Expedition.
When I say giant...although the temperature was over 90, I had to turn on my headlights so I could see in the shadows this thing cast 3 seconds behind itself. Not only could I not see what was going on in front of this monstrosity, it was so large I actually could not see both sides of the back end. It was huge.
Well, the best part of this subtly hued bright red monster truck was the bumper sticker I could barely make out off in the far distance of the left hand rear bumper. It said, and I quote, "I'm Driving Hunger Out of Oregon."
Uh-huh. And how exactly are you doing this? Oh, I know one way. The profit any given station makes from one fill-up alone for you keeps two people employed. There are two jobs. And the tow truck driver who cleans up after all the accidents you cause because nobody can see around you, there is another job. And of course, there also are two doctors, 17 nurses, 23 administrators, 7 insurance billing agents, 9 people trying to figure out how to avoid paying off on the insurance claim, 42 paperwork filing clerks, and a secretary involved in the accident you caused. So there are, hang on, let me do the math, 112 jobs you have created. Of course, the dude who sold you that then retired off the comission, so we will take one back.
So yeah, having created 111 jobs, you certainly are driving hunger out of Oregon. Now if we could just get you to go with it.